This computer is a tease. It appears to function, but then dies before it ever actually surrenders any goods. See, it's only capable of one useless task before it freezes up: I can open the email, but if I click to respond...goodbye. I can open a news site, but if I click on an article to read...goodbye. I can move my suicide_letter.doc to the trash bin, but if I then try to click the browser to search for new reasons to live...goodbye.
I have really pushed my luck here by opening the LiveJournal site, logging in, and then clicking A THIRD TIME to write this message in a box. It will take a miraculous fourth click to submit this post. Let's see what happens.